Whatever we think we can or cannot do, is exclusively limited to our belief system and internal programmes. It wasn’t until yesterday that I was able to truly understand what this actually means.
My life (like most of us) is extremely full and predominantly guided by daily obligations and responsibilities. It has taken me years to fully walk in peace with this, because I acknowledge that each and every one of these “obligations” is self-imposed. For example, I have chosen to have a family and hold a role as mother and partner with all its responsibilities that result in me doing a lot for others at many times when I would rather be doing my own thing. I guess that is what we call life.
But is there something we’re missing? Today we live with so much more than ever before, resulting in so much more pressure and speed. Stillness is considered extremely rare and sacred.
In those slithers of stillness (relative to what often feels like a whirlwind of daily living compounded by technology), is where we connect fully to ourselves.
This is where we see the light of our potential and where we can become intentional by linking what we really want from our lives to what we need to do to get there. Yet how much time do we put ourselves in this space, just to be, to hold and to dream?
Once you know what you want and have worked out what you need to do, the “how” unfolds on it own. I have experienced this time and time again and am always in awe of how life fully supports me when I am clear about what I want.
So exactly one year ago, after having completed the 65km UTCT (a massive accomplishment in my humble opinion), my partner, looked me in the eyes and said, “I am going to do this again next year, would you like to also run a shorter distance”. Well, just to be clear, I do not consider myself a “runner” and although I absolutely love being in the mountains, my running career up to this point has been a non-starter.
I had seen how hard he had worked to do this, and the exhilaration of achievement, that I somewhat hesitantly said “yes”. My first choice was the shortest option of 21km. He then told me that this was happening the day after the 65km that he was running and that the 35km was on the same day as his. Don’t ask me why, but in that moment I just felt that it would be more fun to run on the same day (knowing full well that we were not even going to run together). So, I signed up for the 35km.
This year, I learnt so much about the power of intention. This was a goal that did not involve the word “try”. Once I had said “yes”, it was about getting clear that I needed to get my butt into gear and start training as best as I could, with an already very full plate. I was committed.
Again I was reminded that you do always find the time. Although my consistent training started late, the pressure was mounting and I had to do the one thing I struggle with the most, commit to a schedule, get support where I could and then start running on my own.
Not one part of this journey did I find easy. It has been so tough for me and for many reasons. I am amazed at how this concept was realised because this was so wildly out of my comfort zone. Today however, I am sitting here fitter than I have probably ever been and yet feel that I might only have just arrived in a space where this running thing will become a little easier if I keep going.
On the race day, I woke up at 4.50am (Ryan had already left as his race started at 5am, 2hrs before me). And this is where the deepest and most profound thing happened.
I sat up in bed, closed my eyes and made a prayer. This was a prayer to Source creator, to the connection and Source of myself. I breathed in with such a deep awareness of my breath being the source of my life force. I connected to all that is visible and invisible and did something that I have learnt but don’t do often enough. I asked for permission. I asked for support and to be held. I honoured my ability to have a healthy body and the gift of life. I honoured the opportunity to be in the mountains and commune with nature.
It was then that these mantras popped into my mind, and it is this combination that kept me intentional and enabled throughout those 8.26 intense, yet extraordinarily focused hours.
- “One step at a time”
- “Breathe deeply, breathe” With each breath, I am breathing in life. I am alive and connected through my breath to all of life around me.
- “I am humbled, I honour you” Humility to be alive, to run in these mountains with constant acknowledgment to the Trees, Rocks, Plants and Earth.
- “I am as light as a gazelle” With this awareness, I stand more upright and lift my legs higher. It was so funny each time I did this; I felt so much lighter and my speed increased instantly. This is meant to be fun!
I have learnt through this amazing experience the sheer power of intention.
Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it truly will achieve!
More than anything, I am deeply humbled at the connection we have to all of life around us, always there, waiting for us to plug in. We are so much more than our bodies, our minds and our emotions.
In gratitude to this evolving humanWaking